Monthly Archives: January 2013

A wingnut’s guide to the legal process

Affidavit by Greg Hill: "I did not feel it was satire"

Affidavit by Greg Hill, young entrepreneur and We Are Change wingnut, in Park vs. Elson, BC Supreme Court (2012). Source: Court documents. Tracie Park is my legal name.

Maybe you know a nutter freedom fighter battling the tyranny of fluoride, Agenda 21, and being called a “racist” “sexist” “idiot” all the time. Maybe that is you! Either way, good news: this handy legal guide is here to help.*

Did someone call you a name? Take a photo of you in public? Or even worse, publish it? Use this guide to get justice and/or revenge in civil court.

BEFORE THE CASE

1) Give your opponents fair warning about your complaint. Threaten them with lawsuits and arrest at every opportunity. That will establish your credibility as a wingnut man to be feared. Send threatening messages and get all your friends to join in. Note: This doesn’t always work – sometimes people call your bluff.

2) Combine threats and demands. Demand your adversary “debate” you, for example, and threaten to “expose” them with thousands of posters naming them as criminals if they don’t. Judges call this “extortion” and it will look good on you in court, if it comes to that.

IF YOU’RE INVOLVED IN A CIVIL CASE

1) Remember the law is always evolving, so it can be whatever you make it. You can redefine words and legal concepts to reflect your libertarian values.

2) Lawyers will try to take all your money and your rights. Don’t bother consulting them. Your Freemen friends will give you plenty of tips.

3) The rules of the court are designed to confuse you and take away your freedom. Don’t bother reading them. You will automatically get points for doing it your own way, bringing a fresh perspective and figuring it out as you go along.

4) Remember the judge has great power in the courtroom. So you have to be very firm to get what you want. For example, you want someone arrested, but the police won’t take a report? Get the judge to arrest them instead. (Remind the judge that the police are biased in favour of women, people of colour, and Bolsheviks. Show him the proof on Infowars.com.)

PLEADINGS

Examples of pleadings include a notice of claim (to start a court case) or a counterclaim (to retaliate). Pleadings are supposed to be straightforward, but you can make them very very complicated if you want. That will impress the judge.

1) Don’t limit yourself to facts. Gossip, speculation, and innuendo will broaden the scope of your complaint. Put it all in your pleading as evidence.

2) Reporting about events you didn’t witness is called “hearsay” and it’s the best kind of evidence. Put it in your pleading.

3) Not sure what to accuse your enemy of? Use whatever sounds best to you. “Blasphemous Libel” is a good one. “Malicious Prosecution” is even better. Or make something up. You can always define your legal terms for the judge later.

FOR LIBEL CLAIMS

1) Get your hands dirty. Well before the case starts, you should be pummeling your adversaries in the court of public opinion. So if they call you out for being “racist” and you reply that they are the “real racists,” and then you call them “Bolsheviks” and “terrorists” and “mass murderers,” and then you make blogs and videos about it, and then you sue them for calling you “racist,” your position is unbeatable.

2) Republish the offending material. It’s best if you publish your enemy’s insults over and over, word for word, in their entirety. Make sure the whole world knows exactly how your feelings got hurt. When you get to court, explain to the judge that it’s only libel when someone else says it, and consent doesn’t matter.

3) Don’t worry about free speech, the Charter of Rights or the Constitution. Granted, this can be tricky for those who say they value free speech and personal liberty and so on. But remember, the Charter and the Constitution were designed to protect men of liberty and punish everyone else. So you can – and should – demand that the judge shut your enemies down and forbid them from speaking or writing about you again, ever, or else.

Go forth and conquer!

* Note: we are not here to help – we’re actually here to laugh at you.

Disclaimer: This guide is provided without warranty and does not constitute actual legal advice. Information contained here may not apply outside the Province of British Oolumbia, or inside of it, either.

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Filed under Legal Battles, Politics, Ryan Elson, Wingnuts

The judge should arrest me for calling this dingbat a racist

Original artwork (c) 2013 Zoe Blunt

Ryan Elson of We Are Change Victoria
Original artwork (c) 2013 Zoe Blunt

You remember this dude, the one who was stealing my copyrighted work and trying to blackmail me? The idiot has been telling anyone who will listen that I’m a “reverse racist,” a “feminazi,” part of a sinister New World Order conspiracy, and so on. Now he’s asking a BC Supreme Court judge to have me arrested for calling him a white supremacist jerk on Facebook and on this blog. (Spoiler: He is a white supremacist jerk.)

The wingnut, who obviously does not have the benefit of legal counsel, has filed a bizarre pile of claims on behalf of himself, a group called We Are Change Victoria, and neo-Nazi sympathizer Doug Christie. Ryan Elson defends Christie’s views as free speech, while insisting that my speech is a crime.  Yes, really.

The oddball demands are part of the jerk’s counterclaim to my civil action to stop the wingnut republishing my photos and articles. Note: this is not how you’re supposed to make a claim in court – unless you’re a libertarian nutbar, in which case the rules do not apply to you.

STATEMENT OF FACTS
1) On October 14, 2012, Plaintiff [Zoe Blunt] targeted Defendant [Ryan Elson] labelling him and other members of WAC Victoria as “white supremacists” and “racists” in a Facebook event posting. Doug Christy [sic] was labelled this as well … Here we establish the Plaintiff’s Vendetta towards the Defendant.

RELIEF SOUGHT

3) Civil restitution AND court order for criminal investigation and prosecution be brought fourth [sic] on the Plaintiff for Criminal malicious prosecution, Criminal harassment, Conspiracy.

4) Criminal charges be brought fourth [sic] on the Plaintiff for Perjury in association with her claims of “perjury” within her statement of facts on civil claim 12-4008.

5) Injunction to restrain the plaintiff from further harassment of the defendant and his family/friends.

The wingnut claims to own copyright on photos I took of him October 20, 2012 at a counterprotest near a Victoria rally where Christie and other nutters were scheduled to speak. I photographed Elson and two buddies threatening me and the police intervening. He republished the photos and the entire article a dozen times to harass me. Now he claims it is libelous. (Legal tip: This case is a non-starter. Consent is a full defence to libel.)

What will the nutjob do next?? Stay tuned.

(Answer: Predictably, the dude went apeshit about being mocked. Tsk! Some folks can’t handle criticism. In May and June 2013, Elson tried to get a court injunction to take down this website. He failed, of course – he has no case and doesn’t know the first thing about the justice system. He did manage to get an order preventing me (@blunt1) tweeting anything with his Twitter handle (@fixx_revolution) to avoid losing any more arguments on Twitter.

Read the wingnut’s claim against me:

Cover page

Page 2: Statement of Facts

Page 3: Relief Sought

Related:

Wingnuts’ guide to the legal process

So I’m suing this local wingnut

Turfing out the racists

Hate Mail from Haters – the post that started it all

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Filed under Hate Mail, Legal Battles, Ryan Elson, We Are Change Victoria, Wingnuts

Hate mail from my lover

124 signs of an abusive relationship

After five years, maybe it’s time to burn those old letters.

We hadn’t been together long when Mister Ex started picking fights with me. Shouting and raging. Then one night he got really mad and shoved me into a wall. I left him. Then I started putting together the list.

It was therapeutic. Soon I was able to breathe and think again. He was sending long angry letters. That’s how the list started. Looking at the letters and thinking about how someone could say those things to a lover. How someone could think that was OK.

He tried to convince me to come back. He would promise and plead. Then the insults again. This time, I agreed with him. “You’re right,” I’d say. “I am an awful woman and a terrible person. You obviously deserve better, so I’m setting you free to find your soulmate.” That enraged him. (Everything enraged him.) The list grew longer.

Months later, he showed up at my door to demand that I move back in and accept him on his own terms, or else. I said no. I showed him the list. He blew up and ordered me to destroy it. I didn’t.

The list was done. I moved and left no forwarding address. I boxed up his letters and locked them in the cabinet under the basement stairs with the spiders. Today they’re going into the fire. Continue reading

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Filed under Feminism, Hate Mail